I love you but…

I made a promise to myself before I even started this blog, that I was never going to write about love for a number of reasons which I would not like to state as of now. I guess I’m breaking that promise. Can I just start by reminding you that love is not always enough and that you deserved to be loved.

“Love is a beautiful thing”, a good friend recently told me that. True! Love is beautiful and if you would like to know why, I will refer you to the most quoted book, the Bible: 1 Corinthians 13:4-8.  Love is natural and it literally just happens. There are things that you should be aware of though, people may use your love for them against you. People will call you weak because of your love. People will disregard you because they know you love them. When is it time to call it quits? When is enough really enough?

You need to love and respect yourself first, cliché I know. but its true, if you know how to love yourself, and appreciate being alone and are just in love with who you are and appreciate your flaws and are constantly working on being a better you, it is difficult for you to settle for the next best thing. You know exactly what you want, you know what you can not tolerate but because you have not mastered the art of self love you will settle for whoever says they love you even though it is evident that they don’t love you like they should or at least like you deserve.

Self love is not an easy thing, I take it to be like yoga. Extremely impossible from the spectators viewpoint, hard when you start and even when you are beginning to get used to it there are still some poses that will challenge you. I hope you understand the comparison and where I’m going with it. Let me say it is hard but as we all know “hard does not mean impossible”.

Don’t settle for less than what you deserve, how do you know what you deserve? if you love yourself, anybody who loves you any less is a no-no and this is clear. In all my relationships I always told  the people I was with that I loved them more than they loved me, and this was evident to me but they all didn’t believe me until the end when I reminded them that I told you I loved you more. I’m that type that loves wholeheartedly, in my eyes you become perfect, I could defend you any day if I ever had to, but I find as I grow that people these days aren’t like that anymore. People fall in love with who they think you are, or the idea of you together but not with you. They will pursue you like a man looking for water in a desert and then he gets the water and its like he forgets how much he worked to get the water. I hope that comparison is as clear to you as how it is in my head. Someone on my Facebook recently said that “these guys want you and when they have you they don’t know what to do with you” which sums up most peoples relationship problems.

Don’t stay in such a situation, know when to let go. When the love is over, don’t force him to stay. A strong person knows when to walk away, I’m not saying walk away after your first fight and I’m not saying don’t fight to make it work, I’m just saying know when to walk away. This is why I hate writing about love, I get all emotional and I write down one million things that aren’t even related. I guess if I were to summarise this to you I would say, love is a beautiful thing. Be careful its beauty is not like the apple that Adam and Eve ate in the garden of Eden, it was beautiful too now, wasn’t it? You deserve to be loved, you are not desperate though. You love yourself more than anyone ever will, but you deserve that one person who will love you so much they challenge your love for yourself. Dont settle for the next best thing, you deserve the best. you are the best and he who does not see this will never love you enough. I wish you all nothing but the truest of love.

I recently wrote on Facebook: Pray that you are never the reason someone feels like they are not good enough.

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