Dont Judge a book by it’s cover.

We are all familiar to this saying, but do we all understand it like we should? Cliché, I know but the idea behind it can change how you go about your day to day life. I discover that most of the people I now spend time socialising with will ALWAYS I mean ALWAYS remind me of how I was when they first met me. Let me break it down for you, I am a shy person, I am a shy person who speaks a lot. I speak a lot, I am a person who speaks a lot to people I know. The first day I meet you, I am like a new born baby I literally just smile and look cute, but that’s not just it I study the kind of person you are. I will listen to the things you talk about, are you a Kardashian fan or a Feminist who believes the Kardashians demean what woman have worked very hard to become? I am an undercover spy on a mission. The second time I meet you however I am a fifty two year old woman with no filter or brakes. In my mind I know you. What I find irritating is people who will tell me “you were so quiet the first time I saw you” really? what would you have wanted me to say, Hey my name is Nkateko, I am a Law student, I can Bake, I read a lot of magazines? NO because no one likes a person who talks about themselves a lot. Don’t get me wrong, I will have a conversation with you if you let me, the depth of the conversation is in your control. I will not assume you love politics simply because you are studying law too, that’s why I study you. People say I am dramatic but I know a lot of shy people that speak a lot once you get to know them. I don’t judge you based on our first interaction but the second time I meet you I know the kind of jokes I can and cannot make in your presence. Should you happen to be completely different the second time I meet you, you will never hear me say “you were so outspoken the first time I met you”. You constantly reminding shy loud people  of how they were the first time you met them is not helping anyone. Are you perhaps reminding me of how I was because you want me to be that person again? Do I overwhelm you with my randomness? If only you said “i would have never predicted that you are this fun to be around,from the first time I met you” that is you saying I judged you but I regret it. Dear people that tell people who were shy the first time you met them that they were shy the first time you met them, please change. Dear shy loud people, continue making them regret judging you from your first meeting. I am unapologetically  an opinionated, outspoken introvert and I believe in people being their true selves. How can you be your true self if everyone constantly reminds you of who you were?


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